Mother knows best...

I think one of the most remarkable things about my mom is that she has no idea how incredibly wonderful she is. I’m going to be 20 in a month, and I hope that I end up being half the woman that she is. She has one of the biggest hearts of anyone that I know. She is strong and can laugh off just about anything. I can’t even put into words what my mama has meant to me, and how wonderful she is. She always said that you don’t get to pick your parents, but if I had a chance to pick I’d still her. She’s more concerned about being my mama and less concerned with being my friend.  I am so glad that she’d rather show me how to live and who to be rather than making sure my friends think that she’s cool.  I think that makes her the coolest mom of all…I’m just saying. She’s beautiful inside and out and she taught me everything that she knows about everything. She never passes up any opportunity to teach me something new whether it be a biblical truth or a nerdy science fact.  I love my nerdy, quirky, beautiful, brave, caring, and brilliant mama. This song pretty much is about my mama I’ve decided. : )

Also…this song describes her wonderfully.

Honesty corner

Lately, I’ve been praying that the Lord will teach me HOW to pray. I know that sounds totally weird to PRAY about learning HOW to PRAY, but y’all….in doing that I have to tell you, I’ve been so convicted of my prayer life.

Soooo I’m going to be really honest with y’all….

Sometimes I pray for my own little blessings more than I pray for the healing of my family’s hearts.

Sometimes I pray about MYSELF more than I pray about my brother, mama, AND daddy…COMBINED.

Sometimes I pray more about my grades in school than I do about glorifying the Lord where I am right now.

Sometimes I pray to the Lord and try to pretend like I’m fine, but I’m not. (And He KNOWS that..so why would I try to hide from Him?)

Sometimes I pray that a friendship that I know needed to end could start back up more than I pray for the Lord’s will to be done.

Sometimes I pray about my future (that I’m not even guaranteed) more than I pray for using the time that the Lord has given me right now.

Sometimes I pray more about things that I want and pretend like I need…than I  thank the Lord for the blessings that he has lavishly poured on me.

Sometimes I pray for my future husband more than I pray for my family members, friends, and complete strangers who are lost.

While I have been so convicted of all of these, the last one hit me like a ton of bricks right between the eyes. Girls, let’s be honest for a second…how many times have you prayed for your future husband this week? How many times have you prayed for just ONE of your lost loved ones this week? How many tears have you shed over a guy? (Be honest.) How many tears have you shed over someone you love who is headed to a very real hell? If you’re anything like me, you’ve cried over things a boy has said/done to you more than you have for the lost. And if you’re anything like me then you’ve definitely prayed about that special man that is still out there somewhere (Lord willing) than you have for the lost. Y’all, I’m not telling you that you shouldn’t be in prayer over your future husband, because you should. BUT I am telling you that if your future husband is more of a priority in your prayer life than the lost…then you need to re-prioritize your prayer life.

Yes, I should pray that He will continue to watch over me and my family, and I should pray that he continue to watch over my future hubby… BUT I should be praying for the nations too! I should be filled with gut wrenching ANGUISH FOR THE LOST. They are headed to a real hell. And if I believe that, if I really believe that…then WHY do I  NOT PRAY for them MORE? WHY do I NOT TALK TO THEM about it? Oh…that's right…because I’m too obsessed with praying for a man that I’ve never even met…and I’m too busy worrying about what they’re going to think about me if I try to talk to them about it. Ouch. I see what you did there, God. I’m too SELFISH to care about people that I love. Isn’t that insane? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I pray about the lost, but I don’t feel that anguish for them that I should. I used to feel that anguish, and I wondered where it went and why I didn’t feel such urgency anymore and the Lord revealed to me that my compassion for the lost was being trumped by my desire to get married.

I mean, I don’t know your life, you may be filled with such agony at the thought of people suffering for eternity, but if I’m being honest I lost that feeling a long time ago. But I’ve been praying that the Lord will restore that anguish. I know it seems so weird to pray to feel agony, but that feeling drives me to talk. That feeling of anguish makes it impossible for me to back down or chicken out. I’m only blogging this, because 1. I wanted to be honest...and 2. I don’t want anyone to wake up and realize that they lost urgency for reaching a lost and dying world, because you were too busy praying about yourself or your future spouse.

P.S. I’m NOT telling you to not pray for your future spouse, (please don’t take that away from this blog) because I definitely believe that you should be praying for them. BUT I also believe that you should be praying that people will come to know Jesus as their Lord and Savior more than that.